Time-Traveling Tour Agency Unveils New Adventure!

ByAlthea Provost
  

“Native American Time Hops” – The Ultimate Temporal Experience!

Are you tired of mundane vacations? Bored with the usual beach resorts and city tours? Look no further! Introducing our revolutionary time-traveling adventure: “Native American Time Hops”!

Destination: The mystical Mojave Desert and enchanting Chaco Canyon. 🚗 Mode of Transport: Your trusty car (with a side of cosmic energy). ⏰ Time Distortion: Guaranteed! (Disclaimer: May cause mild existential confusion.) 👻 Guides: Actual Native American ancestors (they’ve got the best Yelp reviews).

What to Expect:

  1. Beam Me Up, Scotty!: As you drive through the Mojave, watch out for the mysterious beam of light. It’s not just a UFO; it’s your portal to the past! Roll down your window, stick your head out, and let the time warp commence.
  2. Fashion Flashback: Ever wondered what ancestral couture looked like? Feast your eyes on traditional Native American attire from various epochs. From buffalo-hide chic to feathered glam, you’ll be Instagramming like it’s 1492.
  3. Lost in Translation: At Chaco Canyon, meet the chief who speaks a language even Google Translate can’t decipher. Don’t worry; he’s just inviting you to the cosmic powwow. Dance moves include the “Wormhole Waltz” and the “Quantum Shuffle.”
  4. Souvenir Alert: Forget fridge magnets! Collect memories (and paradoxes) as you interact with your time-traveling companions. Warning: Conversations may loop infinitely.

🎟️ Book Now! Limited spots available. Call our hotline: 1-800-WORMHOLE. Operators are standing by, wearing tinfoil hats for authenticity.

🔍 FAQs:

  • Q: Will I age backward during the trip?
    • A: Only if you eat enough kale and believe in parallel universes.
  • Q: Can I bring my pet velociraptor?
    • A: Yes, but it must wear a disguise (preferably a fedora).
  • Q: What if I accidentally step into another dimension?
    • A: Don’t worry; we’ve got a cosmic wrangler on standby.

Remember, folks, this is a limited-time offer. Reserve your spot before the space-time continuum runs out of seats! 🕰️

Feel free to share this whimsical adventure with your friends and family. Happy April Fool’s Day! 🎉🤪

Based on a true story.
Click to Read
Buckle Up Buttercup
Why are Velociraptors among the most misunderstood dinosaurs?

Althea Provost is an award winning author of Four Aliens and a Funeral, a clairvoyant, soul traveler, and host of InnerTV. As a spiritual teacher working for the empowerment of star seeds, Althea meets you where you are and together, higher self to higher self, provides now-moment guidance. Her company, Thea’s Heart LLC,® provides Starseed Adventures to sacred sites for initiation, activation, and to awaken others to their next level of awareness.

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